In a groundbreaking study featured in The New York Times, psychologist Arthur Aron explored a profound question: Can two strangers fall in love simply by asking each other the right questions?
His answer? A gentle but resounding yes.
Aron developed a series of 36 questions, carefully crafted to foster trust, vulnerability, and emotional closeness—ingredients that often bloom into love. When two people willingly open up, share honestly, and truly listen, something beautiful can unfold.
Intrigued by the study and still healing from a recent breakup, a journalist decided to test this theory herself. She invited a man she barely knew—someone she’d never even spent time with one-on-one—to meet her at a bar and go through the questions as an experiment.
Find out exactly what questions unlock the heart for a deeper love connection here.
Over the course of an evening, something unexpected happened.
She later wrote:
“I wondered what would come of our interaction. If nothing else, I thought it would make a good story. But I see now that the story isn’t about us; it’s about what it means to bother to know someone—which is really a story about what it means to be known.”
While love may still hold mysteries we can’t fully explain—biology, chemistry, timing—this experiment revealed something powerful: Love may be more intentional and more accessible than we think.
“I’ve begun to think love is a more pliable thing than we make it out to be,” she mused.
“Arthur Aron’s study taught me that it’s possible—even simple—to generate trust and intimacy, the feelings love needs to thrive.”
And yes, in case you’re wondering—they did fall in love.
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❤️ Why the Right Questions Matter
Whether you’re falling in love, staying in love, or trying to rebuild a connection, asking intentional, heartfelt questions can be a game-changer.
They help us:
- See beyond the surface
- Understand values, dreams, and fears
- Build emotional intimacy
- Spot red flags before they turn into heartbreak
So often, relationships unravel not because love wasn’t there, but because the right conversations never happened. Unspoken expectations, mismatched visions, or deep misunderstandings—many of these can be avoided with honest dialogue early on.
Asking the right questions won’t just help you fall in love—it can help you stay in love, too.
